Wiped out and wounded

Apologies for leaving you hanging.  My Radiotherapy completed itself so quickly that I barely noticed, to be honest it was quite nice to get out and drive (not queue) across Bristol for a few days.  At first I was fine, the skin reddened quickly, however, I thought I was going to be one of the side-effect free lucky ones.  I had plans for the month of feeling fine before I went back to start my new job with the Cabinet Office.  Unfortunately the plans remain a pipe dream.  Last week an overwhelming fatigue hit me so hard I couldn't believe it was real.  I was waking up having slept relatively well given the inflammation in my chest wall, but by the time I was up I was magnetized to the sofa without even the energy to pick up the tea Jezz had made for me, I even ate lying down.  Fortunately my day with the most energy coincided with the wonderful VE celebrations and we were able to join our street for a lovely sunny day of safely distanced chats with neighbours which was truly uplifting.

In my tiredness I have also failed to regale you with the story of the pellet injection.  Due to the Coronavirus, oncology has moved to the dental school.  Imagine a room with probably 70 half walled dental surgeries within it, each fitted with a dental chair and lamp.  Every 4 or 5 dental pods is a cancer patient plugged into IV drugs or having another procedure, it was weird, very weird. It was also the single most painful thing I have ever had done to me.  

Zolodex is a pellet administered through a spring loaded 3mm needle which is shoved about 2 inches deep into your tummy fat. I don't have that much so I had to scrunch up (on my dental chair) whilst the monster needle was jabbed in from the side. No anaesthesia.😱

After lying (almost crying) in my dental chair for 15 minutes, I walked back to the car with my jeans undone, there were people in the car park but the jeans just hung open, I didn't care, they were not touching my painstricken tummy.  Jezz found my non-stop cursing all the way home highly amusing. The pain lasted a few hours during which I was a mess, I ended up with an egg shaped swelling for a few days but that was fine. These injections are scheduled monthly and I may have to have them for 5 years.  The biggest understatement I can muster is: This is not a prospect I relish!

By next month the first injection should have stopped my ovaries working and they will start me on aromatase inhibitors to make sure that if my body even thinks about making oestrogen it will have to think again.  So far I have had a few blazing headaches which I am attributing to the Zolodex but have not decided to murder Jezz yet so I am hopeful with regard to the mood swings!


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